April 10th, 2012

“We all go a little mad sometimes.”

Norman Bates: It’s not like my mother is a maniac or a raving thing. She just goes a little mad sometimes. We all go a little mad sometimes. Haven’t you?

Marion Crane: Yes. Sometimes just one time can be enough.

Psycho

The Madness of Deathwing. It took longer for me to finally think of what I was going to do with the kill post than for us to actually kill it I think, but here it is…the penultimate news post of Grandeur’s trek through the Cataclysm expansion. There will be one more post in a few days I hope as one of our many video producers is working on his masterpiece. As soon as it’s complete, I’ll share it with all of you.

I know a good many players find the game has been “dumbed down” and/or has grown stale, but I for one actually enjoyed this final tier of the expansion, even though the fights didn’t provide as much fodder for my twisted sense of humor as some of the earlier content did. Maybe I’m getting old, but the 125 or so attempts to down heroic Spine is about my limit now. The days of tolerating 400+ tries to down a boss are in my past I think. If I tried to do that anymore, I think I’d be like Norman Bates…

I think I’d go a little mad.

Madness was what ultimately got me to thinking. The Madness of Deathwing. So what, exactly, was his madness? Freud would probably diagnose Narcissistic Personality Disorder with Delusions of Grandeur. But think of all the madness you could endure in the final encounter of the expansion as a player. I thought I might list a few for your enjoyment.

First of all, repeatedly wiping to Deathwing on the final platform might drive you over the edge and turn you into a Psychopath. You can check to see if this has occurred right here on our news feed in one of two ways. First of all, you could read the following:

Or, alternatively, you might just look in the mirror and see if you bear any sort of resemblance to this fella:

As a note, you’re almost certainly a psychopath if you know anyone named “Clarice.” Please take it under advisement.

If you’re a raid leader and you ARE wiping repeatedly on the final platform, you may resort to desperate techniques to alleviate the pain. For example, you might be a kindred spirit of this young lady.

Just in case you need help with defining what it means to be a Cutter, the internet is, as always, at your beck and call!

Finally, you might find yourself being driven bonkers by another phenomenon common to the World of Warcraft raiding scene. This is particularly common when someone foolishly says in mumble, “Well, that 2 percent wipe sucked, but it’s no problem now. We should kill it in one or two more attempts.” (I’m looking at you, Teribleterry.) Inevitably, this will lead to six or so hours of repeated wiping on the second platform as people get one-shot by a variety of mechanics that they were earlier avoiding in their sleep. This indicates that your raid is showing symptoms best illustrated by this design:

Tell me that’s not the coolest manic-depressive picture you’ve ever seen.

Anyway, in my research for this post, I also came across one of the…oddest…websites I’ve ever seen. Apparently there’s this dude out there who’s obsessed with the names of phobias. (In itself, I’m sure this constitutes some sort of obsessive-compulsive issue, but I digress.) I delved down into the list and found quite a few phobias that may be related to or even possibly caused by the Madness of Deathwing encounter. Either way, I offer this to you, the loyal readers of this page, as things you might want to watch out for should you be working on heroic Madness. Symptoms may present suddenly, but are more common after several wipes.

Myxophobia could conceivably be caused by repeated exposure to the Madness of Deathwing. I mean, I know they’re supposed to be formed of the corruption of the old gods and everything, but most of the stuff that lands on the platform in that encounter seems like slime to me.

In addition to slime problems, you can also be infected with parasites during Deathwing’s Madness. Not everything is always bad though. Consider:

A good deal of the shit that attacks you during Madness is blood of something or other. I suspect this disorder might be common:

And you have to watch out. Your fellow raiders might also be inflicted with an irrational fear of the help you’re given during the fight. Consider this…

Worst of all, the very platforms upon which you fight for the preservation of the world can turn against you. All of us refer to them as “the red platform” and “the blue platform,” don’t we? Well, this in itself could be a problem!

Last but certainly not least, in my continuing effort to keep my readers educated on all topics both subtle and gross, I give you this beauty. I dream of the day one of those little smart-ass fuckers at the Scripps Spelling Bee gets this number as a word in the seventh round:

Anyway, watch out for these crazy disorders. They could crop up at any time.

As usual, at the end of our posts, I give you the money shot. Er. I mean the kill shot. I always get those mixed up. Although I had to get creative this time since even though I actually remembered to get a screenshot this time, there’s not really a good deal to screenshot once you dispatch Deathwing. But here’s what I can offer:

Enjoy the farming until Cataclysm. I’ll be back with one last monster video of our trip through Dragon Soul very soon, but for now enjoy the efforts of our usual videographers, Teribleterry and Herat, with their final offerings of this expansion. See you in Pandaland.

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